set of nostalgia drawings by gabriel picolo. i don’t think i have enough space on my tumblr for all his works that i’d like to post.
I’ve already got two copies on disc in my basement (WITH MANUALS/COMICS). However, I would definitely be on that shit if they were in the Humble Bundle.
I’m honestly surprised my sister hasn’t flipped out and questioned me on my Facebook deactivation. As much of a social media stalker she is, I would imagine she is thinking that I have been bullied or something and had to go under the radar. OR that I’m an angsty 13 year old who is over his family getting all up in his business.
To be fair, I’m just an angsty 21 year old who is annoyed that he can’t just shout something into the constant digital noise of the Internet without it being “liked” or “favorited” by his sister. It’s like she’s subscribed to my updates on her phone, which she very well might be. If she doesn’t like or favorite something, she’ll reply to it or comment on it. She’s 9 years older than me, and ever since she essentially ran away from home when I was 10, we’ve been in a bit of an awkward phase. Her leaving home was the final straw that crippled the camel’s back that was my parents’ marriage. From fifth grade to Junior year of high school I had to deal with their conflicts, their bitterness, and their emptyness. She left a void I couldn’t fill. But she blames my mom for all of what happened. It’s a bunch of shit. She prides our relationship for being siblings that have never fought, but the truth of the matter is that I don’t want to fight her on something because anyone that opposes her she cuts out of her life. She cut out my Alzheimer’s-ridden grandmother because she voiced her concern about my sister’s relationship with my mother. If I get cut out of her life, that mean I don’t get to be involved in my nephew’s life. The little guy has seen my grandparents a total of maybe 3 times. He’s seen my mom probably less than 20. He’s been at my dad’s house over 40 times. The kid just turned 5. It’s a bunch of shit.
If she is using social media and technology to try and connect with me, then that means she’s putting the minimum amount of effort into the issue. She’s used twitter to send me tweets that could be texts. But she doesn’t text. She wants me to have a conversation in a public form so others can see it. She wants to appear as the perfect housewife/brother/daughter, but it’s all so insincere. This is one of the biggest issues of social media that I’ve found. People rely so much on the fucking validation of others that they will do things in their life so they can post about it to get attention without being a liar. The minimal rush of dopamine you feel when you get a notification alerting you of someone liking your picture of peppers you bought from the farmer’s market is so fucking important that you post the same thing every Sunday. I’m not trying to say there are right and wrong ways to use social media (though I’m sure there can be quantified ways of looking at that), I’m saying that living a double life in order to appease your peers on social media is fucked up. I made dumbass pun on Twitter today and didn’t get any interactions about it, but I enjoyed having it out there. I would say the same pun in person and laugh about it afterwards.
Thank Odin no one in my family knows I have a tumblr, and maybe two people know what tumblr is. I could journal or writer diary entries about everything I’ve posted on here, but there’s something comforting in the fact that people can read this if they want. I can have a very passive audience that can understand a little more about me through this random snippet of my life. It’s totally their choice if they want to read it or not. This isn’t getting forced on people. If you’ve read this far, you probably know me personally or are just super rad. Or both. Probably both. I love you.
For the record, I love my sister, my family, and my cat very much. I realize my cat wasn’t mentioned in the above post, but he’s laying on me as I type this. I’m very content with my life, too. Thanks for letting me shout into the void of tubes they call the Internet.
Spent $25 on approximately 20 games I can’t play on my MacBook because they were on a super sale and I wanted to experience the nostalgia of games from my past. So I’ll just chalk this up to reasons I have to finally build myself a desktop Windows PC.